Game of Thrones icon Lena Headey reveals her blistering new project Intimacy and talks life after the menopause: "I dont have to give a s**t"

This article first appeared in Radio Times magazine.

Sex scenes in feature films are not the same as they once were. Once it was like the Wild West. But now, if a sex scene is to be shot, an intimacy co-ordinator is involved with guidelines, boundaries and even yoga mats, to chaperone the action and keep body parts in a state of privacy.

Its a mysterious world, perhaps, and one that will be blown open on Radio 4 thanks to Intimacy, a new eight-part comedy drama written, directed by and starring the 52-year-old British actor Lena Headey, who has appeared in more than 50 films and TV series, notably in Game of Thrones (as Cersei), Mrs Dalloway and Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

The series soon shifts into a darker, rapid-fire piece about the injustices and diminishing of women in film, to which Headey can personally attest. I started at 17, she says.

And I did every possible bit of TV or film sex without a co-ordinator [including a nude scene in the ancient Greek epic 300]. I went through all of that alone, with so many wild moments, and as a result of that, Im pretty tough. Im able to say no, Im not doing that. On Game of Thrones she used a body double while filming a scene in which her character is humiliated by a braying crowd as shes forced to walk naked through the streets. Headey later spoke of being subject to a backlash for her decision.

Could she have done with an intimacy co-ordinator back then? Well, I look at Game of Thrones, and we didnt have one all the way through that, but thankfully we did have wonderful directors and great producers. But it was missing. Nowadays Im old enough and ugly enough to look after myself. Or I have enough chemistry with a person so we can discuss it. And no one wants to see me naked any more, which is a joy.

[Lena Heady and Hannah Waddingham in Game of Thrones. Heady is wearing a grubby brown dress and looking distressed, with her hair cut short, while Waddingham and another woman, both wearing grey outfits with head coverings, are stood behind her.]

She laughs. Heres the problem in our industry. The majority of people in the room are men. A lot of men who dont love women end up in our industry. Perhaps they didnt get enough attention in their youth, but they now have power and now is the time to put us in our place. Its the patriarchy, isnt it?

Intimacy begins with amusing on-set dialogue from Headey, voicing the character of intimacy co-ordinator Liza Simmons, discussing c**k socks (protective sheaths to cover the penis) and rubber balls that provide distance between two naked bodies.

Simmons has been hired to work on a film adaptation of the worlds most famous naughty book, Lady Chatterleys Lover and soon realises she has a dark history with its director.

A terrific cast, including Alison Steadman and Thrones co-stars Maisie Williams and Hannah Waddingham, allows Headey to explore issues such as stereotyping, childcare, financial insecurity, sexual vulnerability and body image which most actresses still must confront if they are to succeed.

Add in to the mix nudity women in film are expected to get fully naked; men, very much not so and facial perfection, of which Headey is all too aware. I was told to get my forehead botoxed when I was in my 20s. And I was also told to get my teeth straightened by Harvey Weinstein.

Ah yes, the infamous Miramax producer and convicted sex offender who is currently serving a prison sentence in Rikers Island, New York. I made a film distributed by Miramax, says Headey,

The Brothers Grimm [released in 2005], and we were promoting it in Venice. Harvey and I went for a walk, and he tried to kiss me, and I was kind of drunk and young and didnt give two sh**s. But I thought, Youre 52. And I told him to get lost. He sent me flowers the next day, and said Im really sorry. Six months later I met him for breakfast. The thing about Harvey is that he knows every film ever made and Im also a huge film nerd. So he said, Im going to screen whatever film you want, and Im going to give you scripts, come up to my room. And we got in the lift, and when we got in, I just knew. And my whole body shut down. I said, I think youre thinking I want more than friendship, and I have no interest in that.

He marched me, literally, to his room. He was so big. But his key card didnt work. Eventually after trying again and again with the card and punching the door, he took me downstairs and said, Never say anything to anybody. I got in my car and just cried. And he never offered me a role in any of his films, ever again.

Today, Headey lives in Brooklyn with her husband and two children. How has she faced not just the likes of Weinstein but the whole Faustian gig of being a woman in the movies? When I was growing up, nobody talked about all the sh*t that goes on, so I just survived. Through humour, a lot of the time. Thats also why I wanted to write Intimacy.

"I write a lot about what it is to be a woman, and how abuse happens to us. Not in a large, public way involving fighting and shouting and going to the police. That doesnt happen. What does happen is shame and it gets turned on you, and then you harden up a bit. But this show is my refusal to become bitter about it.

[Lena Heady, wearing a black dress and red earrings, stood in front of a blue backdrop.]

Intimacy is written with authority, humour and enormous verve. Everyone sounds like theyre really speaking, not reciting lines. Headey says she loves writing because at last it gives her agency, particularly as her choices in what she calls the toxic cycle of Hollywood are dwindling. Whether because of the writers strikes, or other stuff, everything is full of fear and we are making very repetitive television. Theyve even remade Little House on the Prairie!

Last year my agent said, Usually I would have around 35 projects to offer you. Now I have five. And of the five, each has only one female character over 35. And three of them have already gone to famous people, and the other one is French. So, thats about one or two possible jobs in 12 months. And every other actress of the same age is waiting for the same thing.

She flashes a proper smile. There is an upside. I went through the menopause, and I was like, well now I dont have to give a s**t. I dont care any more. She pulls her trousers. I can wear elasticated waists and its great! If Im in a scene it takes twice as long to light me. Before, you just stood by a window, but now they bring 17 silks in to diffuse the light.

She shrugs. Its a shift, becoming a new version of yourself. But I love writing and pushing to direct. Thats my goal. I want to be like [French film-maker] Agns Varda in my 60s and 70s, directing great films with great people. Or, if Intimacy is anything to go by, more radio drama.

The latest issue of Radio Times is out on Tuesday subscribe here.

[1-SE-31-1-Cover]

Intimacy will be broadcast on Radio 4 at 11pm on Monday nights, beginning 27 July. It will also be available on the Arc podcast feed on BBC Sounds as a boxset from 22 July.

Check out more of our Audio coverage or visit our TV Guide and Streaming Guide to find out what's on. For more TV recommendations and reviews, listen to The Radio Times Podcast.