'My best friend sleeps with another woman I had a right to know and I feel betrayed'

If you have a problem that needs solving and you don't know where to turn, look no further.

Every day, the Daily Star's very own agony aunt Jane O'Gorman is on hand to tackle your issues and concerns with some straight-talking but sound advice.

• From bedroom confessions to self-confidence issues , drug use and everything else, Jane has helped thousands of Daily Star readers over the years and isn't slowing down.

If you want help, you can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP or email jane.ogorman@reachplc.com. Please note that Jane cannot respond to individual letters and not all problems will be published.

Secrets and lies

My best friend has been keeping secrets from me. Ive just discovered that shes been sleeping with a female lover two years. Why didnt she tell me this herself? Suddenly, I dont know her. Weve always told each other everything and now I feel humiliated and betrayed.

All those times she cooed after everyone from Brad Pitt to Harry Styles with me were all a sham. My boyfriend tells me to get over it, but nothing has been real because shes chosen to lie.

JANE SAYS: Remember that your mate is an individual and her private life is her business. Yes, youve shared certain moments and experiences, but you have your life and she has hers.

Presumably she doesnt quiz you every time you go to bed with your guy so how is her sex life any concern of yours? Your chap is right; you must step back and respect her right to privacy. Shes still the same person youve always known, and she doesnt have to justify herself to anyone.

No doubt you now feel that your friendship has entered a new era, but you cant judge or dominate her.

Make friends with her again; apologise for crossing a line and recognise her for the kind, unique pal she is.

Ghosts at the feast

Our May 2027 wedding is turning into a nightmare.

Not only are my girls parents insisting that 30 of their friends be invited, but theyve also put three of her ex-boyfriends on the list.

Costs are spiralling, tensions are rising and Ive just about had enough of it.

Apparently, all the friends and ex-boyfriends have to be invited because my girl grew up with them.

My girl suspects that her Dad owes a lot of people a lot of money and this is one way of keeping a few of them sweet.

Im in this relationship for a healthy, honest future. I love my girl but am having endless sleepless nights.

JANE SAYS: I suggest you go back to your girlfriend and rethink this whole thing. How about a smaller ceremony, with just immediate family, somewhere intimate?

Explain how you feel about the ex-lovers so that she knows exactly where you stand. But you also need to bear in mind that you wont just be marrying your girlfriend, youll be marrying INTO her family.

Even if the ex-lovers arent invited to a smaller wedding, your in-laws might wish to include them in future events.

Do you really love your girl enough or do I detect the whiff of second thoughts? Keep talking to her about what is important and dont allow anyone else to bully or intimidate you.

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